As we round the corner into December I can see Christmas in the distance and I'm starting to reach for the beta-blockers.
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Got to keep my nerve, though, and focus.
Got to think about food.
Got to think about presents.
Got to avoid getting Covid.
The last thing might not be so easy what with Omicron on the doorstep.
And it being an anagram for Moronic.
And it sounding a lot like Oh My Gawd!!!.
This time last year it was Alpha? Beta?
Jibba, Jabba?
I'm starting to suffer Greek alphabet fatigue.
But first, got to vote in the Local Elections today.
I was reading through the candidates the other day and noticed a thing about a cat the RSPCA was trying to re-home.
Liked chasing it's tail; Disliked loud noises.
Finally a candidate I can relate to.
Maybe I'll vote for the cat.
Not to be flippant about democracy, though, given it's under siege lately.
Autocrats around the world so concerned about election outcomes, they're rigging them.
Radical groups so alarmed about autocrats, they're acting like them.
Local mavericks talking civil disobedience if governments keep telling them what to do.
Like get vaccinated, and leave Ivermectin to the vets.
Surely that reference to the vets is an omen. I AM gonna vote for the cat.
You know the world's gone mad when Local Elections start to make sense.
Meanwhile, gotta focus. Food.
Talk of Christmas menus is already circulating and once again, little regard is being paid to diabetes, heart disease and general food coma. Thank goodness.
Though illogical, this is reassuring in an anti-vax kind of way, and very helpful when planning a Christmas spread.
Mainly round the gut, where most spread emerges come New Years resolution time.
(Note to self: pick up ham.)
Not a great time to be a prawn, either, but definitely a good time to make some inquiries as we'll need a bridging meal on the 25th linking enormous breakfast with leftovers from night before.
Might have to slaughter something else.
Perhaps my BMI.
Now, what was the next thing? Presents.
Jeepers. Covid has changed the way we shop what with Black Friday coming before the Boxing Day sales.
Have I missed that boat too?
Perhaps we could do secret Santa this year, where the secret is Santa doesn't exist.
But bah humbug, we all know that's not true.
Rudolph the In-The-Red Reindeer is tracking our credit card movements.
Ho ho ho-pefully we don't all end up too much in debt.
In the meantime, have a Merry Christmas.
Try not to mix your Omicrons with your Oh my Gawds!!! (too much).
And Vote 1, the gift of giving.
