I would love to watch morning television but the early-morning derangement of rearing three children put me off for life.
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There was already too much noise in my life.
These days, I walk every morning, mainly listening to Radio National. Makes me feel prepared for life.
That doesn't mean I don't go to iView to see what the hell is going on when all hell breaks loose.
ABC Breakfast News co-host Lisa Millar certainly gets some people agitated.
They say she's her father's daughter, as if that's a bad thing. For those who don't know, Clarrie Millar was a Country Party politician last century and apparently everything Millar says or does betrays her allegiance to conservative politics.
Can't see it myself. On iView, she looks to me like a regular interviewer, charming and hostile in turn. Let me just say this. That is perfectly normal. If you think you can have a conversation with a Labor minister without getting the shits about stage three tax cuts, you are so very wrong.
What I did see this week was outrage over Millar's clothing followed by an avalanche of tabloid coverage.
Millar wore a skirt with a split and therefore showed part of her thigh. Oooh wah. Scandalous. Thighs. A deadset descent into unhingement, as the response from the Twitterverse revealed.
That in turn fuelled stories at the Daily Mail and news.com.au. If you are interested in knowing how to describe that kind of coverage, my best guess would be "concern trolling", which Urban Dictionary defines as pretending you are sympathetic while exploiting the problem for your own benefit.
"Poor Lisa" - but please let us republish terrible things said about her.
The good news for all of us in this is the response from the ABC itself.
For years, women at news organisations all over the world dealt with trolling all on their own or with a self-developed network of peers to get you through the bad bits. It veers from fat-shaming to sexuality-shaming to threats of violence.
Just to set the record straight, I am an overweight mother of three who is happily married to her partner of 44 years (married for most of them).
You don't have to be a manhater or unhappily married to think badly of men, many men.
But the ABC, which also came out in defence of Leigh Sales, published a hilariously harsh account of both the trolling and the subsequent news stories: "Under the guise of concern, these stories are republishing abuse ... If Daily Mail Australia and news.com.au were genuine in their concern about such behaviour they wouldn't amplify it by republishing the comments they describe as 'vile' and 'sickening', accompanied by a screenshot. Giving anonymous social media bullies publicity on a national platform is participating in perpetuating antisocial behaviour and the very serious issue of online abuse of women."
But there is better news at the ABC and I'd like to think Lisa Millar is an example of what might come. Millar is a glorious vibrant 54, an excellent example of the contribution that older people make to the lives of any organisation.
I won't name names but the ABC has lost too many older women from its organisation - and its audience notices.
That might explain why the ABC's own gender pay audit reveals a 5 per cent gap between men and women. The ABC has agreed to the MEAA's demands for an audit of its gender pay gap.
Last year, women in the ABC's NSW newsroom, led by TV newsreader Juanita Phillips, asked for a "confidential staff survey on workplace culture within ABC News".
I thought that would never get up. I was so wrong.
On Wednesday, Justin Stevens, the ABC's director of news, sent an email to all staff revealing that confidential staff survey is on its way, after a national series of forums where women had the chance to speak out (as much as you can speak out when your bosses are in the room).
He wrote: "Themes that emerged included part-time and flexible work, career development, opportunities for senior women, the way stories are assigned, work opportunities and cultural issues." I hope it asks senior women why they feel they are forced out.
The ABC, he writes, has consulted with a number of groups including the Australian Human Rights Commission, the Diversity Council Australia and ANU's Social Research Centre.
"The next action will be an independent survey of all news employees about their experience of working at the ABC, exploring issues including gender equality, implicit bias, casual sexism and the effectiveness of existing grievances processes."
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As former ABC senior journalist Karen Percy told me: "In my experience older women are not valued in the ABC. There's been an obsession with getting a younger audience, and that was used by some editors to sideline older woman - yet somehow the older men still manage to stay in the spotlight.
"Older women are more likely to be steered into assisting or producing younger reporters, which has value in passing on skills but it should not be the only way older women can contribute.
"It's still a very male leadership at the top who fail to actually see older women, and certainly don't consider what they can contribute in the long-term.
"Ultimately there are so few opportunities for older women, they leave.
"Look at the 2020 redundancies and the stellar female talent that left."
It's a shame that survey can't go back and interview the 28 women (yeah, I've got a list) - "stellar female talent" - who disappeared during the redundancy round in 2020 with apparently more-to-come.
I desperately love my ABC but diversity includes age, as well as all the other factors. It's fantastic to back in Millar, aged 54. More than trolling and abuse, that should apply to other women of a certain age.
- Jenna Price is a visiting fellow at the Australian National University and a regular columnist.